How amichein bonding makes life balanced

About 6 months back I read a great book. The dog listener, made me aware of amichein bonding techniques. As I started to use these techniques, I discovered how much more balanced my dog was and how our relationship strengthened. He became calm, more confident and began to really trust my leadership without my yelling or forcing him as some so called trainers suggested. It also completely allowed me to trust my own judgement for what I knew was best for both my dog and myself. I read about these success stories and gained confidence in myself as well. If I were to suggest 1 book to read it would be tough because I have read a bunch but, I would choose to recommend "the dog listener" over any other. What upsets me is I started to read it nearly a year before when I first got my dog but, I had to bring it back to the library before I read barely any of it. I think had I read it in its entirety to begin with how much better our start would have been.
I want to outline some of the techniques starting with the one that is the most difficult to do but, makes the most difference in your life. When a pack of wolves seperate and then return to one another they will reestablish the leadership role and read one anothers travel story. The leader doesn't concern his or herself with the others unless they need tending to or protecting so the key when you return from work or from the yard or wherever is to ignore the lower ranking pack members: do not look, touch or talk to them for 5 minutes time.
Come home walk in sit and read the mail or paper or go to the kitchen and fix a snack or a drink whatever you can do. I walk up my stairs and stand by the front window for a few moments and allow my dog to sniff my pants and access where I was etc. then I get a glass of cool drink and sip it for a few minutes while I relax. I know it is hard in the beginning, you love that your dog runs tail wagging to jump in your face and lick or whatever. That behavior is anxious behavior and should be separated from your return. By all means call your dog over after 5 minutes and hug and wag and whatever this does not stop you it only delays the greeting. by calling your dog they will respect your time and your space and still love you but, be in control of themselves not only on your return but while you are gone too.
Some dogs get so anxious awaiting your return they will eat, chew or destroy, dig, rearrange furniture, pee/poop, get on counters, bark non stop, you name it... This technique allows dogs to feel it is no big deal to be on their own because the reunion is no big deal nor is the leaving this means when you leave your house be it for a minute or 6 hours, you say nothing, you get up your stuff and walk out without a word. Believe me after a week you don't even notice this change in your behavior but, you notice a dog who is much calmer and comfortable with your comings and goings.
Some dogs will apparently get really upset in the beginning because they are in charge of your comings and goings and how dare you act like a leader when you didn't earn it. well these other bonding techniques and leadership responsibilities help you with being the leader.
Meal time!!! Leaders eat first, they can eat again after the pack if they want but, definately eat first. This doesn't mean if you don't eat a breakfast that you have to. We introduce gesture eating here. I used dried cranberries some people use a cracker or some nuts but, the idea is you eat a little bit and make it look to be coming out of the dogs bowl. Pour their meal into the bowl then I spit a tiny bit into the bowl, some people use their hands to get the food to smell of the leader. Then you eat your gesture food and bring the dog bowl to the dogs food station. You don't have to give a command but, I practice eye contact with my dog if he breaks the eye contact I lift the bowl back up slightly and represent it repeating the focus command. he then has 5 minutes to be left quietly to eat in peace. If he leaves the room the food is removed until the next meal and he is assumed to be done with this meal. Grazing is not a good idea with dogs because the leader controls food and if you let them eat all day they are in charge.
The barking!!! You can teach your dogs the "quiet" command but, most will do what is called alarm barking or sometimes protection barking. This is when the old lady down the street walks by your house and your dog barks to let you know. You address this in amichein like the wolf leader would. You investigate by going to the window and assessing the situation(sniff, look) and dismiss the action but thank the courtesy. I tap my dog twice on the side and say "good boy, thank you" start to walk away and if you need to follow up with a quiet or that's enough command.if they still don't relinquish control it is because they don't trust your judgement and you may go to the window and leash them up and do a little obedience with them. I found for me that watching the lady walk safely by my house a little longer seems to make him feel safer. Whenever I see him think about barking but chosing to either remain quiet or give a little grrr or buh I praise him for his "quiet" and good quiet. As time goes on he learns to not warn you of the people or dogs or garbage trucks you have already cleared from his responsibility. a couple months back we got neighbors and their dogs barked at anything then because he didn't know why they were barking he started in. Well I released him from being responsible for their alarms and kept telling him, thank you and that's enough and over the past month he only barks about 1 out of 10 times they bark. He doesn't bark at all when the other neighbor dog barks. I found this one hard because if I am in the bathroom brushing my hair and getting ready for work and the alarm barking starts I have to rush to investigate like a responsible leader does. Just remember, never tell your dog "no" for barking or tell them they are silly because it it the little girl or whoever. This gives your dog the idea that you are displeased with their instinct. You can train them to be quiet most of the time but, it isn't fair to expect your dog not to use his voice ever. you try it and see how you like being a mute.
Lastly is the walk. The leader always leads this means go through doors first, on the bed or couch first and you lead during the walk. I don't make my dog heel 100% of the time he sits on the couch with me and sleeps at the foot of my bed but, he knows he must ask for privledges and if he does not he gets none. If we are walking and he pulls to a tree I stop cold and if he doesn't retreat to me he does not get lead to that tree. Yes, it is annoying to stop when pulled but, if you don't you end up on a walk with your arm nearly pulled from your socket and being dragged this way and that which I think is a tad more annoying wouldn't you say. Some people hold their dogs in heel position thinking they are teaching heeling what they are teaching is that you don't care if they are pulling as long as their head remains in heel position. Your dog will get it they do what works and by not giving in to the pulling you make it not work. The dog will be happy to walk near you if you teach them that is the best option. Afterall they are all options really commands are disrespectful and a good leader is followed out of choice and are respected for what they bring to the table.. think of great leaders of our history and ask were they just commanding or were they followed because they were respected.
Respect is usually what we all want and dogs are no different in that value.